Week 24

It is officially spring!  While parts of the country have not yet accepted this fact, my area is full into lush springtime.  Daffodils are up, trees have new leaf buds, my camellia plant is overwhelming in bloom, and their is a warmth in the day.  Sunshine mixed with rain is bringing all sorts of life to my area.  I find that I am extra grateful for these small blessings now that I am working with people who will not be able to view most of this for themselves.  

The adjacent minimum prison has a vegetable garden that the inmates can work in, but medium security does not.  Some trees can be seen in the distance of most of the yards, and a few plants are scattered around areas the inmates walk through, but mostly its just grass and cement.  Not especially inspiring for the Pagan spirit.  

Part of my work with Pagan inmates is to help them find ways to connect with the four elements while living in a very limited setting.  Water is one of the easiest elements to connect with since it used so often in our daily life.  Washing our hands, having a drink, taking a shower, and other basic cleanliness tasks all involve some form of water.  I encourage inmates to make showering into a sacred act if possible, and to use this time for meditation and prayer.  Most have responded really well to this suggestion and have adapted it to suite their particular style and needs.  

Air is another element that inmates can easily access.  Now, the air in the prison I work with is not the best quality.  We don't have windows that open and the exterior doors only can open briefly.  The air is usually too warm or too cold for comfort and thick with the smell of whatever the kitchen is cooking. Still, our breath can connect us to the element of air anytime and anywhere.  It is constantly available to us.  Inmates also have told me that they use their time outside on the yard to practice deep breathing, watch the clouds drift through the sky, and sometimes to find a lost feather or two.  

Earth can be a trickier element to connect with.  Some of the yards have a patch of dirt or grass, but not all of them.  The inmates who do have this like to take off their shoes and put their feet into the dirt on sunny days.  Others will try energetically to connect with the earth that resides under the cement that they are surrounded by.  While the food that they are served is not the freshest, most of it came from the earth at some point so it can be a natural way to connect with the earth if you spend a moment in contemplation.  

Fire is the hardest element to connect with.  No candles, matches, smoking, or incense of any kind can be used by inmates in my state.  Some of the volunteers are allowed to use a candle or incense in the chapel and we have a sweat lodge and sage smudge that can be used outside.  On a daily basis I encourage inmates to connect with the energy of the sun, which is affecting them even if they can't stand outside in it.  Food also holds the energy of the sun.  Produce has been grown through photosynthesis and the heat of cooking has turned ingredients into a meal.  The stars at night are delightful fiery globes that, despite their distance, we can still connect with.  

Each week our Pagan group sings the same simple chant: Earth my body, water my blood, air my breath, and fire my spirit.  I have noticed that new group members are sometimes startled by the mention of "blood" in the chant, and when I see that look of alarm cross their faces I try to take a moment to educate the group that we sing this chant in order to remember that we always have the four elements within us at all times.  We don't need anything special to be with the Divine, we just need to take a moment to appreciate the gifts of nature that are around and within us.

Spring Blessings!

Holly

Week Twelve

I have been very busy this last week.  It is almost the end of the term, so I have been in "Finals Land."  I also have had a lot of pastoral counseling requests when I am at the prison.  The result is that my days are very full, and I have not been blogging enough.  I actually am working on two posts that need more research than I have time to put into it at the moment.

Soooo, I am going to post a quick fall meditation that I wrote and used last night with the Pagan prison group I facilitate.  I love using breath to connect with the elements.  I like to remind the inmates, and myself, that all we need to be Pagan is to present in the moment.  That the Divine and the elements are all around us, and within us, at all times.  After we did this brief meditation we sang the Earth My Body Chant.

Fall Meditation 

Breathe in three deep breathes.

With your next three breathes, breathe in the fall air that smells of damp leaves and moss.  Breathe in the spirit of air and let it fill you with the energy of forgiveness.  

With your next three breathes, breathe in the warmth of the autumn sun that fights to shine through the clouds.  Breathe in the spirit of fire and let it fill you with the energy of determination.  

With your next three breathes, breathe in the wetness of the fall rain showers.  Breathe in the spirit of water and let it fill you with the energy of compassion.  

With your next three breathes, breathe in the aging of the autumn gardens that prepare to slumber through winter.  Breathe in the spirit of earth and let it fill you with the energy of wisdom.  

Breathe three more breathes and with them breathe in the Divine Spirit.  Breathe in the love of the Green Man & Woman, the God & Goddess, the Sun and the Moon.  Breathe in their blessings and ask them to walk with you.  

Blessed Be.  

Week Seven: Samhain in the Prison

Samhain is an ancient Pagan holiday where the dead are honored and welcomed back into our lives, if only for a night.  Samhain is traditionally celebrated on October 31st, and it is often referred to as the ‘day without a day’ because it falls between New Years Eve on October 30th and New Years Day on November 1st.  It is believed that the veil between our world and the one the dead inhabit at its thinnest on Samhain and its sister holiday, Beltane.  Both holidays are wonderful days to work with tarot cards, read your tea leaves, and watch your dreams for messages from loved ones.

For Pagan inmates, Samhain can be a particularly difficult time.  Many inmates have never processed grief without some form of addiction or acting out to distract them from their pain.  While drugs, cutting, and violence do occur in prisons, it isn’t as easy to access, and many inmates find that those old patterns no longer serve them.  So what do they do with this pain?  Imagine never having felt the stab of pain one gets when loosing a beloved mother ten years prior, and to then have it suddenly leap at you while in prison.  It is difficult to bear, yet vitally important.

Some inmates carry the intense grief and shame of knowing that they have taken a life.  Others have experienced what one inmate referred to as “a prisoners worst fear” of loosing a loved one while incarcerated.  When this happens the inmate’s doesn’t get to hold their dear ones hand one last time, to say I’m sorry, or to ask for forgiveness.  Other inmates have the complicated emotions of having a family member die who was also their abuser.

Tonight will mark the second time that I have been part of a prison ritual for Samhain.  My intention is to provide a healthy representation of grief, and to be an extension of the Divine’s love that is unconditional and beyond reason (as the volunteer I work with is fond of saying).   I want to provide a sacred space where they can feel comfortable both feeling the joyful memories of the past, and the sorrows of today.

We will start the ritual by grounding our energies, calling the corners as a group, inviting the Divine to be with us, and then singing We Are The Flow. 

We are the flow, we are the ebb.

We are the weavers, we are the web.

We are the flow we are the ebb.

We are the witches back from the dead!

After the chant, I will pass out pieces of paper that are used as place cards for table setting.  Inmates can write the name of loved ones on the front of the card and then write something about the person in the inside.  We will have time to share memories with each other and this portion may take a while.  This is when grief shows her face.

We will have cakes and ale and listen to a selection of songs that have to do with the cycles of life and death.  One of my favorites is Ancestors Song by the fabulous Kellianna.  She has many songs that speak to this time of the year, and I highly recommend all of her music.  http://kellianna.bandcamp.com/track/ancestors-song

I will end the ritual with a reading from Starhawk’s ThePagan Book of Living and Dying.  On page 148-149, she has a set of prayers to be said just after someone has passed away.  I think their beauty and power will serve us in our time of remembrance.  In Starhawk’s words

May she/he become a star

In your night sky cauldron

And be brewed back to life.

May you all have a joyous and heartfelt Samhain,

Blessings,

Chaplain Holly

Reflections

I just returned from the AAPC NW Regional  Annual Fall Conference on Therapeutic Strategies in the Treatment of Adult Survivors of Incest & Child Abuse.  I learned so much that I don't know quite where to start!  

I'll share a brief reflection that came on the first evening. We had a meditation period where mainly Bible passages were read. After each reading we had some quite reflection time and then we sang "oh Lord come and save us".  I didn't care for this.  It clearly was not presented in an interfaith manner. I also do not feel like the Divine is my lord, but rather an advisor and companion. The Divine doesn't need to save me because I don't believe in sin. 

While everyone else was singing about their Lord, alternate words began to float through my mind. What follows is my recollection of them, to the best of my memory. 

     On your knees you crouched, hiding from the darkness, looking for the light.  She came like an angel but could not save you.  She held you instead and shared your pain, wept your tears, and ached for your heart.  Gladly would she have traded places with you if she could have, but she had no body to be abused, she had no innocence to be stolen.  All she had to offer is her loving presence and watchful eye.  She saw it all.  She saw the ugliness thrust upon you, and she saw the the untarnishable beauty of your soul.  In these moments of darkness she is called to you, shining like the bright face of the moon illuminating the night.