Sunday, December 22, 2013

Week 14

As the term came to a close I wrote a short reflection paper about my strengths and weaknesses as a prison chaplain.  I have edited it a bit to remove the name of the prison and such, but the rest is here for anyone who wants to read it.


Cherry Hill Seminary
Student Internship:  Fall 2013
Professor Valentine McKay-Riddell
Holly OBrien

State Correctional Facility Intern Chaplain
End of Term Self Evaluation

           

Introduction
Working as an intern chaplain in a prison has given me the opportunity to put my theories and faith into motion.  This work has proved to be both challenging and rewarding.  It has pushed me to expand my knowledge and comfort zone in ways I would not have predicted.  Specifically, I have noticed personal growth in the areas of leadership, pastoral counseling, and interfaith spiritual competence.
Leadership
            I am not a natural born leader.  While the role has never been comfortable to me,  I have often been complimented on my leadership abilities.  Being a leader in a prison can be an unpopular role (although my supervisor pulls it off quite well!).  I sometimes have to be the person to say no to inappropriate requests even if they are understandable.  I also reprimand inmates who are not using the chapel space in a respectful manner.  This can be uncomfortable for me at times, but I acknowledge that it is a necessary part of being an effective leader and makes spiritual services more pleasant for all.
            I am the type of person who feels comfortable following rules in order to support the greater good of my community.  Following rules can make life simpler.  As an intern chaplain,  I have found this to be not always be accurate.  While it is easy for me to simply say Im not allowed to let people use the phone, or no touching is allowed, not all situations are equal.
            I might look like a hypocrite if I do not treat all situations as the same.  It also makes me sensitive to the specific situation that I am dealing with.  It can be a difficult balance, and I dont always get it right.  Sometimes inmates will manipulate me to into making an exception for her.  Other times I will err on the side of caution when I probably should have allowed something to happen.  Both experiences are unpleasant, but both are also part of the learning process that I am engaged in.
Pastoral Counseling
            The most rewarding part of my internship has been being able to provide pastoral counseling to the adults in custody.  At first I really was not sure if I was helping people or not, and I felt ambivalent about my success.  What does success look like anyway when you are working with someone experiencing deep grief or trauma?
            Over time, two things helped me put this worry (mostly) aside.  One was that my supervisor told me that I could gauge my success by how often people referred me to other adults in custody.  My referrals have been steadily increasing, and I have also had several inmates ask to come back and see me again because they felt good about our first interaction.
            The second reason I gained confidence in my abilities as a pastoral counselor came from the Counseling Skills and Interventions course I took during the same term.  This course helped anchor me to the repeatedly proven fact that successful counseling is far more dependent on the quality of rapport between the counselor and client than any particular counseling skill.  It also stressed the importance of what we came to know as evocative empathy - the ability to listen and be very present and nonjudgmental with a client while also helping them find the deeper meaning behind their words.  Evocative empathy can be more complicated than it sounds, but I have had a lot of practice with it this term and have found it to be very effective with this population.
            The other weakness I have had to work to overcome has been my natural desire to solve problems.  As a cardiac nurse,  this was pretty much my whole job, but it does not translate well to prison chaplaincy work.  For one thing, it does not serve the person I am working with for me to do the work for them.  It does not help them grow as a person if I find the solution for them.  It is important for criminally minded people to work on how to successfully solve problems without negatively affecting others if at all possible.                        
            Evocative empathy and ministry of presence seems to be natural partners.  I have seen that my natural calming nature can be therapeutic to people in stress.  Sometimes I may think that I have not really done anything specific to help someone, and yet they say that they feel better after talking to me.  I think it is the ministry of presence that must be at work then.  The power of just having yourself held in compassionate energy, and heard without judgment is a powerful thing.
Interfaith Spiritual Competence
            One of my areas of weakness is working with advanced Pagans.  Paganism is such a diverse religion that I can not possibly know how to teach its many areas of complexity to everyone.  Sometimes people want to know about a specific Pagan path, and it can be difficult for me to provide them with the information they seek.  I am a very eclectic Pagan and I do a little of this and that, depending on the situation I find myself in.  This works well for people new to Paganism, but it can be less satisfying to an advanced Pagan.  I remind myself that I work with people that, for whatever reason, are serving time in a state prison.  Serving time means not having the luxuries at home; including having the same spiritual life one could have on the outside.
            Before I started my internship in a correctional facility, I was concerned with how effective I could be when working with Christian inmates.  It did not take me long to realize that 75% of the people I would counsel would be Christian.  I felt unprepared to provide them with the spiritual direction they needed.  In time, and with the help of many people I spoke with, I came to embrace that most people really are looking for a place of supportive comfort.   I was reminded that pastoral care is without the boundaries of faith.  Love is transcendent.
            Praying with inmates has been one of my less confident areas.  The first few days I worked at the prison I avoided asking if people wanted a prayer.  My supervisor gave some good advice on how to structure a prayer to be interfaith and still personally meaningful.  This helped me immensely, and while it is still not my favorite part of my work, I feel far more comfortable with it.  A few people who have come back specifically said they enjoyed the prayer I had said for them the time before.
Conclusion

            In general, I tend to overthink the work that I do and can be too critical of myself.  I suppose that is the way it tends to be the way with new professionals and students.  One of the paradoxes of life is that our weaknesses can be our strengths, and our strengths can be our weaknesses.  In my time as an intern chaplain I have found that my weaknesses have lead to surprising new opportunities and that areas I felt strong in have been challenged.

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